Angus Ashworth puts both his left feet forward in a spot of Lancashire clog dancing, while David Harper reads from a secret diary written in code which reveals explicit details of a relationship sealed in what might be Britain’s first gay marriage, 200 years ago.

A pact to surprise one another results in things taking a continental turn – David takes up the accordion, a vintage Italian one, while Angus hopes a French pipe in the shape of a cockerel won’t go up in smoke at auction. Unsurprisingly, Angus has to go cap in hand to his last dealer to secure a last purchase, intent on blowing his entire stash once again.

Who will salvage their fortunes this time as they make their way to a saleroom in Angus’s beloved Yorkshire with a boot load of chimney pots, old cases and a galvanised steel washtub? As they say in these parts, where there’s muck there’s brass